How to Lead?
/I was having trouble finding my voice. I knew the place from which I should lead, but I feared being seen as overly spiritual.
Fear won, and as the coronavirus realities began to set in, I moved into operations management mode, my flesh as my strength. I charged ahead at warp speed to control, protect, secure, direct, and coordinate. My words were walk in faith, by my actions communicated rise and conquer. It did not take long to see that my ways do not work. Things that I worried about losing captivated my mind. Where my ultimate trust laid was revealed (a Starbucks caramel frappuccino is a short-lived comfort.) My long-term faith was not shaken; I did not fear the outcome of this time grief or the pandemic. However, I did not want to walk through this season and face all the challenges.
God's word lifted my eyes off of the crises and on to his ways. The sweet, challenging reminder of Proverbs 16:9 struck me deeply.
The heart of man plans his way, but the Lord establishes his steps. Proverbs 16:9.
Reading 1 Samuel 3:10-14 led me to a time of personal repentance.
And the Lord came and stood, calling as at other times, "Samuel! Samuel!" And Samuel said, "Speak, for your servant hears." Then the Lord said to Samuel, "Behold, I am about to do a thing in Israel at which the two ears of everyone who hears it will tingle. On that day, I will fulfill against Eli all that I have spoken concerning his house, from beginning to end. And I declare to him that I am about to punish his house forever, for the iniquity that he knew, because his sons were blaspheming God, and he did not restrain them. Therefore I swear to the house of Eli that the iniquity of Eli's house shall not be atoned for by sacrifice or offering forever.
My trust was in my own ways. My idols were self-sufficiency, convenience, and pleasure. Just as Eli knew that his sons were not following God's ways, so I knew that I had chosen my own. My heart was divided. I needed to repent, turn, and go God’s way. I did not feel condemnation, but conviction as I realized the King of Kings, the Creator of the world, was loving me and grabbing my attention. He was calling me to walk in fellowship with Christ and join him in his work in his world.
He was also moving me to lead from that same place, a heart of repentance.
Father, forgive me, I have sinned. I entertained other gods. My heart wears sackcloth and ashes; I repent. I have betrayed my King. During this crisis, help me to resist the temptation to overcome in my own strength. I will not strive, protect, plan, escape, binge, start something without you, or finish something old of my own. Thank you for knocking me off of my track and driving me into fellowship with you. May I be about your will and your glory. Give me rest, purpose, and peace in you, and you alone. Raise me up in humility to lead in repentance, with a heart of mercy and speech of grace. Make me a reconciler. I will take my place in the kingdom of priests. I will come to you for my fellow man on my knees. Rescue us, I pray, send revival. In Jesus Name.
Let's practice social distancing out of love for others while we practice drawing near to the Father out of hearts of repentance. That may sound a little corny, but it is a valuable resolution in our reality.
~con todo tu corazón Mk 12:28-31~
Jim Schutz